Who doesn’t love a giggle? Be it a light titter or a guffaw that sends your cappuccino blasting over your fellow coffee shop patrons, sure it keeps you young.
I’ve an odd oul sense of humour. My liking someone is in direct correlation to how strange a character they are. I can always spot one of my own kind. If you’re twisted – you’re in the club.
Most of all it’s important to laugh at yourself. Life’s too short to be taking yourself too seriously, and sure we’re all headed the one way anyway so you might as well enjoy yourself while you’re here.
Bearing that in mind, I like laughing at myself when I think about this….
I was never one for the drug scene. I’m enough of a eejit after a night on the sauce, so I thought I’d do humanity a favour and stay away from the hard stuff.
In fact I’m very anti-drug, but I’ve tried it a couple of times over the years to try and keep up with the cool kids. I’m happy to report I’m not very cool.
Once a school friend of mine managed to get a hold of a drop of weed. Well sure we didn’t know what the hell to do with it. I couldn’t roll a joint if I had a roll of cellotape, 2 toilet roll tubes and a Blue Peter presenter to supervise.
After 20 minutes of surmising and pretending to her mother we were revising or doing the rosary we had the grand idea we’d stir it into some yoghurt and eat it.
So there we were getting our daily calcium intake and we waited….nothing.
“Will we do another bit?”
“Aye sure why not, go ahead”
“Are we doing it wrong”
“Jesus I dunno, maybe we didn’t do enough”
It was then we decided to stick the last of it onto some cheese on toast (we ate all the yoghurts). And waited again. Still nothing.
We brought it to the dark side..
At this stage I was bored out of my tree, said my goodbyes and headed home.
On the way my head started to get a bit fuzzy but I put it down to the fact that I’d just consumed enough dairy products to keep Ben and Jerry in business for 6 months.
I got in and there was my mummy bear on the settee.
“How was your night?”
“Alright, nothing exciting. I’ll watch a bit of telly and head up”
So there we sat in front of the box when my foray into the drug world started to kick in. I was freaking out. But I kept my cool and stared at the telly making light chit chat with my mum.
It was at this stage she turned and said:
“Did you take anything tonight?”
*alarm bells* but I was holding my own, watching the telly, no eye contact…I effing had this.
“No sure I said, why do you ask?”
“Cos that TV has been off since you sat down 2 hours ago”
Needless to say she ran me up the stairs so fast my feet didn’t touch the ground. I spent the night sweating my way round the bed watching pink elephants on the ceiling and sure did I get an ounce of sympathy? Nope. (not that I blame her, if my daughter came in whacked out of her head I’d do worse)
“It’s self inflicted and if you touch that shite again I’ll make you eat 4 pound of it”
I believed her.
Don’t forget – drugs are for mugs! Happy hump day!!